As the partner of someone in recovery, it can be confusing and overwhelming. Perhaps you have just discovered that the person you love has a problem with alcohol and needs your help. Both partners feel vulnerable as they transition into their “new” relationship. To help couples during this time, Darlene Lancer, JD, MFT, shares the following post.
Recognizing the Signs of Addiction
A trained therapist or counselor can assist couples in addressing the issues that addiction has caused within the marriage. Remember, there is help available, and seeking professional support is essential in navigating this challenging journey. Addiction can strain a marriage in various ways, affecting the emotional, physical, and financial aspects of the relationship. It often leads to a breakdown in trust, communication, and intimacy. When people get married, they are often filled with joy, hope, and excitement for what the future holds. There are many times when someone can have a surgery or get into an accident that requires them to take prescription pain medications to minimize the pain that they feel.
- By openly discussing these concerns, couples can work together to create a plan for how to handle them and prevent relapse.
- In addictions counseling I frequently hear outrage that, “My partner still doesn’t trust me!
- As the partner of someone in recovery, it can be confusing and overwhelming.
How to support a spouse with a drug addiction and mental health challenges
In addition to individual boundaries, setting boundaries as a couple is also crucial. This can include discussions about financial responsibilities, household chores, and other shared commitments. By clearly defining these responsibilities, it can prevent conflicts and resentment from building up in the relationship. Being patient will be key in getting your marriage back on track, whether you’re living with an alcoholic/drug addict in recovery or you are an alcoholic/drug addict in recovery.
Individual Therapy for Recovering Addicts
It’s about our struggles to survive alcoholism recovery and hold our marriage together. A Spouse’s Guide to Alcoholism Recovery, Sheri and I worked together to write our new ebook from her perspective. It is her story of learning to love me again, and it covers topics we never imagined we would face when I got sober and started on the path to beating my disease. Living with someone who has substance use disorder can be difficult, and also create changes in your relationship.
Getting sober after years or decades of alcoholism was like promising not to pour gasoline on the charred remains of our house after I burned it to the ground. After I crushed my spouse’s soul, I asked for loving support in exchange for promising to not crush it again. Drinking alcoholically means a backlog of real-life, adult problems build up. Arguing with your spouse, getting shit-faced, and venting to your friends, then waking up the next day pretending it didn’t happen is no longer an option.
Others meet new partners after having gotten sober, often people who wouldn’t have been a part of their lives if they were still drinking. One critical aspect that often requires attention is the profound sense of loneliness experienced by partners of those struggling with addiction. They witness the erosion of their shared dreams and the fracture of their once-solid foundation. If you feel that you or a loved one is struggling with substance abuse, our specialists are on standby and ready to help. The last stage of addiction is often referred to as addiction or dependency. At this point, the substance dominates a person’s life—they marriage after sobriety use it compulsively despite severe consequences, such as damaged relationships, financial problems, or health issues.
Why Can’t I Stop Drinking Once I Start? 4 Major Reasons
Sobriety means you’re as equipped as you can be to manage any outcome that comes your way. I don’t know of a single relationship problem that was solved by drinking. I ate when I had to, sometimes drinking until 11 or 12 at night. My husband would hang in there for a few hours but would opt to give his lungs and liver a break and go inside to watch TV on the couch – like a normal person. We gladly paid upwards of $100 USD per person for 4-5 hours of unlimited drinks and buffets. The first thing you need to do is let your loved one know how their addiction is affecting the family.
Critical elements of a healthy relationship can be worn down quickly when one partner is unable to think clearly due to their illness, causing the unraveling of a loving bond. However, with your hard work in treatment and the hopes of long-lasting recovery, there are steps that can be taken to restore your marriage as you begin to rebuild your life. When it comes to overcoming addiction in a marriage, creating a supportive environment is crucial for the recovery process. Establishing boundaries and expectations, as well as encouraging healthy habits and activities, can help both partners navigate the challenges and rebuild their relationship.
Online addiction treatment and couples counseling to help partners through recovery
It is crucial to have Alcohol Use Disorder a strong foundation in your relationship before taking on the added responsibility of marriage. We learned so many unexpected lessons in sobriety, and our marriage is surviving. After years of going backwards once I stopped drinking, we are making progress and recovering our marriage.
These prescription pain bills are often highly addictive and it’s common for people who show no signs of addictive characteristics to become addicted to the drugs accidentally. A major factor in repairing the damage addiction inflicted on marriage is regaining trust. All of these stressors can result in the addict drinking or using in order to return to familiar status quo. It may mean that he or she needs more support or is trying to make change too rapidly. Both partners need outside help to alleviate stress on the family system and guidance in learning new coping and communication skills. Each day of sobriety is a small victory, a stepping stone towards the larger goal of a healed relationship and a healthier life.